Teaching a Perv a New Trick
by rowanashke
Summary: Jiraiya's shocked when Kakashi tells him he's dissapointed in his new book. One shot lemon, KakaJir, request ficcie.


Ok. n.n This is a request ficcie for Lily of Dark Water. Blame her, it's her fault. She specified, quote: "Kakashi reading the book as he banged Jiraiya." LMAO. It's not _exactly_ what she asked for, but it's pretty close. Jiraiya's pretty damn OOC in this, Kakashi's…well, Kakashi is Kakashi. For more info on making a request, please check my profile. I've got one semi-short one and one that's evolved into something incredibly complex and probably at least 20 chapters (I can't WAIT!) so it might take a while to get to you, but I promise. n.n Sorry Lily, I didn't mean for this to take so long, but school kind of snuck up on me. I can't believe they gave us homework on the FIRST DAY. Ok, so this is college and I'm almost 30 and it's supposed to be harder, but JEEZE!!! cough enough ranting. Enjoy the ficcie!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Naruto. I've been forgetting to put these on my stories. I need to remember to do that. I don't own Naruto, I don't own Naruto. I'm so sorry, Kishimoto-san, for what I am about to do to your characters…LMAO.

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Kakashi sighed and closed the book. Jiraiya looked up from his painting and raised one white eyebrow, his expression gleeful. "So? How did you like it?" He waited silently for the sure-to-be-amazed response. One thing he could count on was Kakashi's continual, delighted support of his books. His best customer…

"I'm a little disappointed." Kakashi said thoughtfully.

Bastard! Jiraiya was so shocked he sat up, discarding the painting without paying attention to where it landed. He gaped at the silver-haired man, his mouth falling open in pure shock.

"It's a little…bland." Kakashi continued. "It's not as good as your usual ones."

"Whaaaa…" Jiraiya's mind refused to form coherent sentences.

"You got the seme part right." Kakashi grinned through his mask, his expression growing a bit dreamy. "But I think you're a little inexperienced in what it feels like to be uke. It probably wouldn't have been so noticeable if your main character hadn't tried it."

"WHAT?" Jiraiya finally got out. "I'll have you know that I've had LOTS of experience."

"Really?" Kakashi eyed him thoughtfully. "It didn't come out that way, Jiraiya-sama."

Jiraiya stared at him. "R..really?" he asked slowly.

"I'm sorry." Kakashi looked genuinely distressed. "I'm really sorry. I still liked it!"

"…" Jiraiya suddenly slumped, his expression miserable. "Damn."

"I'm sorry!" Kakashi yelped, looking worried.

"No, no, it's ok." Jiraiya sighed. "The truth is…I've never been…" he shrugged. "I've always been on top. You know how it is." He flushed slightly, feeling rather uncomfortable telling it to the younger man.

"That doesn't surprise me." Kakashi simply nodded. "You're pretty dominant; it would be hard for you to be submissive."

"I am, aren't I?" Jiraiya looked momentarily smug.

"Yes." Kakashi grinned. "Which is why you didn't get the uke part right."

"You've done it before, haven't you?" Jiraiya asked suddenly.

Kakashi shrugged and nodded. "Yeah. Not often, since I'm also a little on the dominant side, but…once and awhile, it's nice to give up control to someone. It takes a lot of trust, though." He tapped the book thoughtfully.

"Hmmm." Jiraiya looked away, his expression furrowing thoughtfully. Kakashi opened the book again and started to re-read it. After a long moment of silence, Jiraiya suddenly laughed.

"What is it, Jiraiya-sama?" Kakashi asked curiously.

"I want you to teach me." Jiraiya grinned at the suddenly shocked younger man. "I want you to show me what it's like. For research purposes, of course."

"Wuh?" Kakashi gasped.

"C'mon. I trust you. You're my most loyal and dedicated customer. And a damn good ninja. I think I could let you take me." He grinned and suddenly was leaning over Kakashi, brushing his nose against Kakashi's mask. "C'mon. Help a poor, clueless author out…"

Kakashi just gaped at him. Jiraiya sighed and shifted his body so he was straddling the younger man. Lifting his hands, he pulled down an unresisting Kakashi's mask and kissed him, his tongue probing at Kakashi's lips. After a brief moment, Kakashi parted his lips to allow Jiraiya's tongue to dart inside, teasingly.

Kakashi raised his hands and gripped Jiraiya's shoulders as the kiss deepened, becoming harder and more forceful. The two shinobi's tongues danced over each other, tasting and exploring.

Suddenly Kakashi growled and pushed Jiraiya away. "Being awful forceful for a man who's trying to learn to be submissive."

"Well, dominate me." Jiraiya smirked. "What? You thought I'd make it easy for you?" 

Kakashi laughed. Then he flipped them, slamming Jiraiya against the ground and straddling the older man's body with his own. "No, not really." He leaned over and nuzzled Jiraiya's neck, kissing and biting. Jiraiya groaned in desire.

Then Kakashi bit him, hard, making the older man cry out in surprised heat. Kakashi tasted blood and licked the wound, grinning. "You like it rough…" he murmured.

Jiraiya laughed. Kakashi sighed and sat back, staring down at Jiraiya thoughtfully. "This isn't working. I think we need a change of scene. My house. I've got some stuff there…" Kakashi grinned suddenly. "It'll be great."

Jiraiya nodded and Kakashi teleported them back to his apartment. There, he pushed Jiraiya towards the bedroom, growling softly. "Strip."

Jiraiya raised his eyebrows and did as he was 'commanded'. "Not very kinky. I usually have a strip scene."

Kakashi grinned and shed his jounin vest and headband, then padded over to the bed and pulled out a box from underneath it. "Well, yeah. But we know you can do those. I want to get to the fun part quicker."

Jiraiya laughed, feeling a little shaky. And…insecure? That was new. He lay on the bed, eyeing the other man as he hummed and sorted through…a very impressive collection of sexual toys. Jiraiya felt his eyebrows rising. What the hell was _that_ one for? For all his extensive history and wide-ranging sexual encounters, Jiraiya had never really gotten much into toys. Maybe tonight's the night, he thought with a shiver.

Finally, Kakashi looked up at him and grinned. It wasn't a very nice grin; it was sort of…creepy.

Then he slapped something on Jiraiya's arm.

Jiraiya gasped as he felt the wall slam between his inner mind and his chakra. Before he could respond, Kakashi pushed him backward and grabbed his arms, pining them above his head. A quick motion with Kakashi's hands and his arms were pinned there.

"What the FUCK!" Jiraiya yelped. "Kakashi, what the hell…"

Kakashi grinned. Then he pulled out…

The book that had started this whole affair.

"'Takeshi stared at the handsome man who kneeled above him. He was completely defenseless; at his mercy. Naoki's skin shone in the moonlight, making him look like some kind of god descended from the heavens. Takeshi felt the first stirrings of passion fill his body. He wanted this; he needed this. He silently begged the other man with his eyes, unable to make his lips form the words, to tell him what he so desperately wanted.'" Kakashi's voice was liquid honey, oozing around Jiraiya.

Kakashi grinned and set the book down. Then he reached out to the box and produced another item. A blindfold.

"Kakashi…don't." Jiraiya cringed when he realized he was almost…whining. "Please."

Kakashi only shook his head and leaned over, carefully tying the blindfold around Jiraiya's head. Jiraiya frowned as the darkness overwhelmed his senses. Between the darkness and his inability to touch his chakra, he was feeling very off-center and unbalanced. Defenseless. Almost…

Vulnerable.

"'Takeshi felt Naoki's hands touching his chest, sending bolts of pleasure shooting through his body.'" Jiraiya moaned in advance of the touch, flinching as he felt Kakashi's fingers trail across his stomach. "Hmm. This is going to be hard to read and touch at the same time. Maybe…"

There was a soft bamph. Then Kakashi laughed. "Read."

"'Takeshi moaned as he felt Naoki's lips on his skin. Naoki's sweet, rough tongue slithered across his taunt, sensitive skin." A clone. He'd called in a clone. The close sounded amused as he read the words.

Jiraiya groaned as Kakashi followed actions to words, licking his stomach and nibbling on his skin, his hands stroking his sides gently. Not being able to see, but anticipating the actions a moment behind the words, was driving Jiraiya crazy.

"'Naoki's lips closed around one of Takeshi's sensitive buds, sucking and nibbling."

Jiraiya hissed and tried to wiggle away, but Kakashi had him pinned to the bed. Kakashi's lips on his nipple made Jiraiya's breath stutter in his chest and he bucked upward, his back arching. "God…Kakashi…"

"'Naoki's lips left his nipple and licked their way down his chest. Then he nuzzled Takeshi's painfully throbbing erection, teasing him with the feel of his silken skin.'"

Kakashi's tongue and lips left a sizzling trail down Jiraiya's stomach. He paused a moment, and Jiraiya actually whimpered, arching his back and searching for the teasing bastard's face. "Damn…it…" he growled.

Kakashi laughed and gently bit him on the soft skin between his belly button and the patch of hair around his shaft. The sensation, unexpected, caused Jiraiya to whimper again in surprised pain.

"Be good, my little uke." Kakashi whispered. "Behave yourself."

"Fucker." Jiraiya hissed.

"Ah ah ah. Bad boy." Kakashi growled. Then he bit Jiraiya again, hard, this time on the inner thigh. Jiraiya gasped and jerked his body, instinctively trying to escape the unexpected pain.

"'Naoki teasingly licked Takeshi's shaft, his tongue dragging along the super-sensitive length until it reached Takeshi's soft head. There, he licked the bead of pre-cum that had formed and swirled his tongue, making Takeshi pant with frustrated desire.'"

Kakashi followed the words with actions, and Jiraiya almost managed to buck him off with the wildness of his reaction. Kakashi did it again, his fingers digging painfully into Jiraiya's hips to still any further motions.

"'Finally, Naoki quit teasing Takeshi and took his rock-hard cock into his mouth. Naoki's mouth was hot and needy, sucking almost painfully as he began to move, his tongue throbbing along the underside of his shaft, his fingers gently playing with Takeshi's balls.'"

Jiraiya's mind went completely blank as he heard the words. But Kakashi didn't move, and after a moment, Jiraiya let out a frustrated sob and arched his back, begging silently. The anticipation was almost worse than pain.

Finally, finally, Kakashi plunged his mouth on Jiraiya's cock, slamming it all the way into his throat. Jiraiya felt the tip of his erection bump against the back of Kakashi's throat. Then he was moving,

The clone spoke again, but Jiraiya couldn't follow the words anymore as Kakashi's sinfully delicious mouth pumped him. Then his mouth left Jiraiya's shaft and he felt something…fingers?...pressing against his mouth.

"Suck." Kakashi's voice was low and rough. It sent a shiver of pure lust through Jiraiya's body. He opened his mouth and Kakashi slipped his fingers inside. Jiraiya sucked them, his tongue slithering around each digit.

Kakashi moaned softly and removed his fingers. Then Jiraiya felt one spit-slick, cool finger pressing against his virgin hole and whimpered in anticipation.

"Shhh…" Kakashi murmured. Then he was kissing Jiraiya's chest and stomach as his finger slipped inside. It felt strange and alien; Jiraiya wiggled unhappily, mentally knowing that it was necessary but unable to suppress his discomfort. He remembered this reaction from his other partners before. I'll be much, much more understanding from here on in, he vowed. Then he forgot to think as another finger joined the first and scissored. "You're so tight." Kakashi murmured. "You really haven't ever done this."

"Fu…" Jiraiya whimpered.

Kakashi slid in the third finger, growling in anticipation. His long fingers wiggled, searching, and Jiraiya suddenly cried out, his back arching so far off the bed it looked like was going to snap his backbone. Explosions of white light were sparkling across Jiraiya's vision. He knew about this part, but…he'd never really thought it would feel…

Kakashi's fingers withdrew and Jiraiya felt him move. Jiraiya, straining, heard soft shushing noises as Kakashi discarded his clothes. Then he was back on the bed and Kakashi's fingers were digging into his legs as he shifted Jiraiya's body. There was another sound, one that it took Jiraiya's lust-dazed mind a moment to identify. Bottle snapped open. Liquid glomps. Lube.

"I'm coming in." Kakashi said quietly. Jiraiya tensed as he felt something hot and wet touch his puckered entrance. Kakashi waited a moment, then gently pushed the head of his cock inside.

Jiraiya gasped in pain and Kakashi stopped, gently stroking his stomach. "Shh." Kakashi whispered again. The pain grew as Kakashi continued to slowly push himself into Jiraiya.

Kakashi leaned over and fisted around Jiraiya's member, gently stroking and rubbing the sensitive head with his thumb. The sensation was distracting enough that Jiraiya felt himself relaxing, and Kakashi groaned softly as he slid all the way inside.

"Going to start moving." Kakashi warned him quietly. Then he started thrusting, shallow and careful, his hand still pumping Jiraiya's cock, his other hand gripping Jiraiya's hip painfully to brace himself. Jiraiya wiggled, arching into the thrusts and letting the pleasure override the lingering pain.

Kakashi switched his hips a little and Jiraiya felt his cock brush that amazing spot inside. Gasping, he bucked into the rhythm. They started to move faster, Kakashi's thrusts going deeper and becoming harder. Jiraiya moaned as he felt the pressure building inside of him. Kakashi responded with a growl and sped up, pounding into Jiraiya roughly. The additional pleasure unhinged Jiraiya's shaky control and he spasmed, his cock spurting into Kakashi's hand, shouting with hoarse pleasure. Kakashi slammed into him again, growling, grinding against his ass as he flooded the older man's insides.

Kakashi collapsed on top of him, breathing raggedly. They lay silently for a time as their skins cooled and their breathing eased.

Then Kakashi gently pulled out of Jiraiya and dispelled the jutsu holding his arms above his head. Jiraiya weakly pulled the blindfold off, licking his lips.

"Damn." Jiraiya said after a long moment. "I need my notebook."

Kakashi laughed and shook his head. "Not now. You're not done yet."

"Wha…" Jiraiya actually found the strength to sit up in alarm, staring at Kakashi's suddenly wicked face.

Then they both looked at the clone, which was reading the book and grinning.

"Oh. Fuck no." Jiraiya said coolly. "There's no way."

"It's only fair." Kakashi said evilly. "He was so nice and sat there through the whole thing…"

"No." Jiraiya growled.

Kakashi laughed. "Ok, fine. Maybe next time."

"No!" Jiraiya said though gritted teeth.

Except his dirty, twisted mind was already writing a story about it.

"Ok. Next time." He sighed in defeat. He ignored Kakashi's victorious face and lay back down, grunting. Oh well. At least this was going to be one hot fucking book!

…


End file.
